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And I Wonder

The first time I saw the Mormon Mommy Blogs logo I thought, 'Huh, that looks like a cute blog -too bad I'm not a mom.' and I clicked on.

Then that little logo started showing up every where so I stopped in to check it out. It seemed like a pretty mommy exclusive deal, and sadly -I'm not a mom. So I went on my merry little way...

Then there was the day that I stopped in and saw the newly added "Infertility" section. I thought maybe I could have a place here after all.
Infertility. Such an interesting topic, don't you think? Just the word drags up all kinds of emotions. Ones that I usually like to ignore. Or just shove down deep, deep, deep. Because really, who likes to poke and dig at open wounds. But tonight it's on my mind. A lot. Normally I'd just let it all out over at my own blog -but you know, people like my MIL and SILs and UNCLE read that blog. I'm a pretty open/ honest person -and I really have no problems sharing the personal details of my life -but somethings I'd just as rather have some of my family out of the loop on.

For example, today is the 27th day of my cycle. I am a pretty steady 28 day girl. Which makes today about the longest and most frustrating day of the month for me.

Month after month, when this week rolls around, I begin noticing every time I go to the bathroom -and I wonder. I notice every time I am extra short or moody with Hubby -and I wonder. I notice every time I feel extra super tired -and I wonder. I notice every strange dream, strong craving, and random possible symptom of pregnancy -AND I WONDER. About 80% of the time, by the 27th day I have convinced myself that THIS will be the month that I get the double pink line.

AND I never do.

Am I the only one that does this??

Heather is a desert girl in a winter world. She likes to think of herself as A Goddess in Progress, which is where she normally spills out the personal/ embarrassing/ random details of her life. Her current pursuits are to finish writing her first middle grade novel and to build her Photography and NuSkin businesses. OH, and she really, really, really wants a baby.

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