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Am I staying Awake?

The night was dark and deep.  The alarm next to my bed went off with a loud and blaring blast, demanding an immediate and hurried response.  I am an EMT and sometimes, a driver, for the Fire Department in my small, rural town.  Tonight, we had a call and I was asked to drive code three, (this means very fast, in fire department lingo) to the emergency room slightly over 45 minutes away.  I was tired.  It was the middle of the night, I haven't had enough sleep in days and there a full moon, which always means there will be many elk along the sides of the highway.  I hung on to the wheel and just kept going, lights and sirens blaring.   

The chilly autumn tempatures were just a little on the chilly side and I turned on the heat.  Naturally, when you combine tiredness with heat, you get sleepiness.  So I turned off the heat, rolled down the windows and kept myself wide awake and freezing cold.  This precaution is so that I don't fall asleep at the wheel. 

While I was driving I reflected how much this is like my life and my relationship with my Heavenly Father.  If you remember from your scriptures, Jesus went to pray in the Garden of Gethsemane.  Three of his beloved apostles were also there.  He asked them to watch with Him awhile and went up onto the mount and prayed and bled from every pore and would that He might not have to drink the bitter cup.  He came down and found them sleeping.  He asked them, could yet not watch with me awhile?  And went back and prayed again, and yet again.  Each time He came down He found them sleeping.

Tonight I reflected how much I am like those tired men.  I drive around on the roads of life through the good times and the difficult ones.  When everything is going smoothly I seem to find that I am not as diligent as I should be.  I am not as valiant as I could be.    I am sleepy and tired. 

As time goes on, things change and I find the cold air or the elk (the trials) in life come and all of a sudden I am wide awake spiritually and I work really hard to stay that way.  

I realize that, like His beloved apostles, I too, have sometimes made similar choices.  I too, have closed my eyes much too often in spiritual sleep.  Sometimes, I struggle to remember that I am here to become more like Him.  The road is not easy, but it really is worth it.  

I looked out tonight at the stars in the sky and was so thankful to be able to see and bear witness of His infinate glory and goodness.  He truly is my Savior, my redeemer and my friend.

Patty Ann is a busy mother, grandmother, and wife. She lives her life in the woods she loves up on the top of a beautiful mountain. She loves music, photography and writing. Most of all she loves her Heavenly Father and enjoys writing about his influence in her life. You can find her on her blog at Pitterle Postings

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