Your Happily Ever After

Lessons Learned in the Ghetto

Wednesday, June 29, 2011

tracy&me1

It was the beginning of the month, so of course I wasn’t thinking about visiting teaching when I found myself passing the grocery store and pulling into her driveway. It was NOT where I had intended to go and I was flabbergasted when I awoke from my “auto pilot mode” to find myself staring at her front door and her gigantic Great Dane—Dexter—while knocking loudly.

I could hear her inside the house puttering around, whispering to her children to go figure out who was at the front door. I figured there was a reason I was there, so I would not leave until she let me in.

I was her visiting teacher, and my husband was their home teacher. Yet, I was frustrated that I had been assigned to this woman. I was certain that I had ZERO in common with her, and even less to learn from her.
Later I would find out that she felt the exact same way about me.

All we knew was what we saw and what we assumed.

She had five kids; I had two. She had an employed husband;  Mine was in law school. She had two cars; I barely had one. She lived in a house and I lived in the ghetto, and not just the ghetto, but Crack Alley Ghetto.

In my world, my life sucked and Tracy had it ALL.

The Lord intended to teach us both a lesson that day when I found myself driving past the grocery store and to her home.

When she finally let me in, it was obvious that she had been crying and it was at that moment—that very moment right there in her entry way—where we moved from being just visiting teachers to Friends.

She was normal and she had cute little problems, just like me.

We were more alike than we were different.

You see, God knew what he was doing that day when he made me drive to her house. We needed each other and we didn't even know it.

That was twelve years ago, the “auto-pilot episode”,  and a real, lasting friendship was born at her dining room table. She is my best friend today—separated only by 1,200 miles.

"We are all in this together. We need each other. Oh, how we need each other. Those of us who are old need you who are young, and hopefully, you who are young need some of us who are old. It is a sociological fact that women need women. We need deep and satisfying and loyal friendships with each other. These friendships are a necessary source of sustenance. We need to renew our faith every day. We need to lock arms and help build the kingdom so that it will roll forth and fill the whole earth." – Marjorie P. Hinckley, Instruments in the Hands of God
It's true, you know. Women DO need other women. We need those deep, loyal friendships. They are essential to our growth. Once you have tasted what a "real friendship" is like, it is not something you are ever willing to go without. On the contrary, it is something that you are willing to walk to the ends of the earth to retrieve because you understand completely the value from having it.

And really? Isn’t that the whole point of visiting teaching?

It’s women moving from the posing and pretending stage and into the real life—I’ve got problems stage—and letting those walls down long enough so that we can nurture and care for one another the way the Lord intended.

* This post was inspired by a question from the 365 days of blogging prompts, Best Friend Series. For more information about the opportunity to get your Essays published in our new book:  365 Days of Blogging Prompts, please visit the Publishing Contest Page.  To get your own 365 Days of Blogging Prompts, please click here.

-----

familyElisa is the owner of Mormon Mommy Blogs . Her husband, four kids (ages ranging 16 to 3), a mortgage and a dog is what provides her food for fodder on her non-award winning blog: Crazyland: Tales from the Motherboard.

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The Parable of the Angel and Her Wing

Tuesday, June 28, 2011



There once was an angel, who had two wings that

could do everything that wings are meant to do.

One of her wings, however, had a piece missing.

It didn't affect the wing at all, other than

it made the wing a little less than perfect in appearance.




This bothered the angel. Everyday she'd spend time

trying to figure how she could fix it.

When she looked at herself the only thing she noticed

was that small missing piece.

She became so focused on what she thought was a flaw,

that she forgot that she had two working wings.

She forgot she could fly.

-----


Heather likes to think of herself as A Goddess in Progress, which is where she normally shares the personal trials, triumphs, and treasured moments of her life as a military spouse and a new mom. 

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A Quick Announcement:

Monday, June 27, 2011

If you have submitted your blog for a listing, or sent in a guest post request or just want to shoot the breeze with us, I apologize for the silence.  Things are a little crazy around here because our trusty Managing Editor, Carolineis having some major health issues.

She has been throwing around words like: Neurosurgeon, mini-stroke, brain tumor or possibly MS. Basically, the Neurosurgeon has no idea what's wrong with her.

Can you please keep her in your prayers? Righteous women can move mountains and we have some major ones that need moving.

Thanks,  I really appreciate it.

Now. Please return to your regularly scheduled internet surfing.

Hugs and Kisses, Loves and Squishes and all that other mushy crap,

~Elisa

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The Real Magic in Marriage

Monday, June 27, 2011

After five days of taking-half-the-day-to-start-the-day, I was ready for a DATE NIGHT. No, let’s say I was half-crazy for a date night. And to me, at that stage of my life, “date night” meant “all-about-ME-night”. I expected to be wined-and-dined, oooed-and-ahhhed over, and listened to with rapt attention, which my honey managed to pull off nearly every Friday night.

However, if my prince, on rare occasion, slipped off his steed in the slightest -- if he was anything less than perrrrrfectly chaarrrming -- his Cinderella, who had miraculously gone from apron-and-hair-scarf to ball-gown-and-crown, would turn into a cold pumpkin come midnight.

One such night had started out all right. We had a nice dinner out, even a movie. When we got home, the kids were already tucked in fast asleep. Things were going so well for Prince that he let his guard down. While I got ready for bed, he paused at the computer for a quick check-up on some business. Baaaaaaaaad idea. I had got it into my head that getting on the computer was violating the Date Night Prime Directive:

Ye shall not take your eyes or ears off your woman.

As soon as I realized that I was talking to myself in the bathroom, Cinderella morphed into the Wicked Queen.

We went to sleep fairly miserable that night. If I remember right, it was one of those nights they tell you NEVER to have: back to back, opposite sides of the bed.

But hold on -- this is where the real magic comes in.

Early the next morning, we were summoned to the stake president’s office. We by-passed our usual morning cuddles and got ready saying as little as possible. The moody cloud dampened our spirits all the way to the church and followed us right into the stake office.

President called me in first. “Sister Z,” he said, “we would like you to speak in our upcoming adult session of stake conference.” I nodded numbly. “What we would like you to speak on is – “

Oh no! An assigned topic?!

He cleared his throat, adding a second to my suspense, then pronounced: “-- strengthening marriage through patience and understanding.”

I went ashen.

I exited. Dale entered. I could not even look him in the eye as we passed.

Four minutes later, he emerged. The door closed behind him. His head was hanging.

“What is it honey?”

He lifted his chin to look at me, a tear about to wiggle down his cheek. “I’m speaking in stake conference.”

“I am too. Did he say what he wants you to talk about?”

“Yes."

We just stood there. I wanted to hold him, and he wanted to hold me, but humiliation held us both.

With more than a little awe in his voice, he finally said:

“The importance of romance in marriage.”

The Lord taught us an important lesson that day, in his magical way, one we have never forgotten: happily ever after is all up to us.

 -----



Mona muses every Sunday at Mona's Gospel Musings and preaches romance in marriage at Mona's Musings with a Hint of Romance. She is the mother of four plus three and the award-winning author or With Mine Own Hand: The Musical Account of Nephi. For a daily Hint of Romance, go to Mona's Musings on Facebook.






 



Photography from Dreamstime

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Free Visiting Teaching Printable for July 2011

Saturday, June 25, 2011


VT printable graphic july 2011

The July 2011 Visiting Teaching Printable is ready for download!

This month’s message can be found by clicking here, and is called Come To the Temple and Claim Your Blessings.

Printables are sized to fit standard 8.5 x 11 letter sized paper. We have 4 different printables for you to choose from: the Mesa, Arizona temple; the San Diego, California temple; the Salt Lake City, Utah temple; and the Washington DC temple.  Each printable comes with a quarter page and full sheet printable.

We also have an extra full sheet printable that includes all four temples.

____________________________________________________________________________

mesa, AZ VT printable graphic july 2011

Click here to download the Mesa, Arizona temple printable.

____________________________________________________________________________

San Diego VT printable graphic july 2011

Click here to download the San Diego, California temple printable.

____________________________________________________________________________

SLC VT printable graphic july 2011

Click here to download the Salt Lake City, Utah temple printable.

____________________________________________________________________________

washington DC VT printable graphic july 2011

Click here to download the Washington DC temple printable.

____________________________________________________________________________

variety VT printable graphic july 2011

Click here to download the Full Sheet Variety Printable that includes all four temples.

____________________________________________________________________________

Now get out there and get your Visiting Teaching done!

xoxo,

Caroline & Elisa

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The Worst Parenting Job in the World

Friday, June 24, 2011

Look out for those claws! 

My absolute least favorite (or perhaps "most hated" is more accurate) parenting job is the trimming of 40 fingers nails and 40 toe nails (OH the toe nails!). 

I mean, sure, diapers are gross, and vomit is never fun, but for some reason the cutting of the nails kills me!

Perhaps it's because of how rapidly their nails seem to grow. Nary a week has passed before I'm required to trim them all again! What am I feeding them to cause this freakish growth? 

Don't negate the dirt! Look, I love little boys. I want them to be as dirty as they need to be in order to fully experience life. Really, I do. I just rinse them off nightly, and call it good. But combine the insane length with the hours of back yard fun, and oh my goodness. It's just very unpleasant. *Shudder*

Add to that their disdain for the whole process, and I am ready to toss the clippers and let them all turn into little Edward Scissor Hands'. It's NOT MY FAULT their nails grow and therefore need trimming. So why do they yell at me? Recently Henry lamented, "I wish Heavenly Father didn't make my nails grow!"

I hear ya, kid, but what can we do?

Their declarations of pain are ridiculous.  NO, I AM NOT HURTING YOU!

They cry out in pain so often that I have a hard time distinguishing when I actually DO hurt them by cutting a bit too close and when they are merely crying preventatively in fear at the possibility that I might hurt them in the vague future.

It's ridiculous.

On a recent trip into the sixth circle of the BAD PLACE we call "nail-cutting", I was cruising right along, oldest to youngest, without drawing anyone's blood. SCORE!

Then, disaster! On the final toe nail of the final boy, a small bit flew off and landed in my eye. IN MY EYE! I couldn't get it out no matter how much I blinked. I finally went and inspected in a mirror. It was literally LODGED in and would not be freed. I had to dig it out with a q-tip. (Are you cringing?)

Perhaps you can now understand why it is the Worst.Job.Ever.

-----

Morgan would rather do anything than cut toenails. It's gross. Follow her blog at The Ing Family. 



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Once Upon a Time

Thursday, June 23, 2011

The other night, we were sitting down having dinner as a family when Josie asks Dave, "Tell me the story about how you met Mommy." I look over at him, just waiting for the words of, "I don't tell it as good as Mommy.... ask her." to come out of his mouth.
But he didn't.

Instead, he said this.

"Well, once upon a time I was at this dance and this girl came in and she was so beautiful and we danced and danced and danced. But then the clock struck midnight and she ran away and I ran after her, but she left her glass slipper behind....."

"Dad! That's not how you met!" pipped up Hannah. "That's the story of Cinderella."

"Oh really?"

"Yeah Dad." Josie confirmed.

"Oh.....well....okay, well your mom lived in this tiny town with her Dad and she loved to read books and one day her Dad got lost and came to my castle and I didn't like people on my property and I made him my prisoner and your Mom came to rescue her Dad and saw me and I was afraid she would think I was gross because I was a huge beast......"

"Daddy! That's Beauty and the Beast!" Josie exclaimed.

"Yeah, that's not how you met Mom. Tell us the real story." Hannah said.

After the back and forth storytelling went on for a bit, I looked over at Dave, just trying so hard not to laugh and said to him, "Wait, let me tell it."

The girls, perked up, assuming I would stop the fairytales with the real one of our "meet cute" and agreed, "Okay Mom. You tell it."

"Well your Dad was married before he met me and had a little boy with one fin smaller than the other. And his wife died and he lost his little boy to a diver who kidnapped him in the ocean. And your Dad was swimming fast trying to get to the kidnapper and he bumped into me, but I was a little weird and kept forgetting things but I told him to "Just keep swimming" and we'd find his son and......"

"Mom!" the girls laughed. "That's not the story about how you met."

"That's finding Nemo Mom." Josie giggled.

"Yeah, that's not it." Dave chimed in.

"Oh really?" I innocently replied.

"Nope. You see girls, Your Mom and I met in high school, when we got paired up to sing karaoke together and then we secretly wanted to try out for the spring musical, but our friends thought we should stick to the status quo and not try something new......"

"Dad. That's High School Musical." Hannah said dryly.

"Anyways, we didn't sing karaoke together in high school, it was at a ski resort during winter break." I corrected him.

"Oh yeah. That's right." Dave said.

For the next half hour Dave and I went back and forth putting ourselves into movie plots, causing the girls to play along to our impromptu "Name that Movie" game. It. Was. Hilarious.

Then finally Dave told them the real story of how we met.

The girls at first,  kept trying to figure out what movie it was from, coming up empty.

I reassured them it wasn't from a movie. It was our love story.

Which, if it were made into a movie one day, would be a box office hit, let me tell you.

-----


Katy loves being a wife and mother, living life to its
fullest, while enjoying yummy chocolate along the
way.  Her roller coaster of thoughts can be found
at Our Daisy Life.  Admission is always free.








* Picture self owned

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Cinderella and Fairy Tales

Wednesday, June 22, 2011


"One Shoe can change your life"  Cinderella



I love all things fairy tale.  I love the happy endings and the happily ever afters.  I love how, though the heroine is surrounded by great trials and tribulations, nevertheless, she pulls through.  (Usually after some help from a Fairy God Mother, or Fairies or some other mythical creature).  To this day, Cinderella is one of my favorite fairy tales.

I love the fact that the entire world seems to be against her.  I love how she is good and kind to others, even when they are not good and kind to her.  I love how, when she is at her very worst moment, someone else steps in and saves the day.  


Child of the pure, unclouded brow

And dreaming eyes of wonder!

Though time be fleet and I and thou

Are half a life asunder,

Thy loving smile will surely hail

The love-gift of a fairy tale.

                                         -   Lewis Carroll


Don't get me wrong, I know that fairy tales rarely seem to happen in our world, at least from the outside looking in, but how many times has Someone Else come to your rescue?  When you prayed because you were alone, or afraid, or lonely or disappointed.  Did Someone Else answer your prayers?  Did you learn to see things a little differently?  Did you find just the answer you needed in your scriptures?  Or maybe on a talk you were writing or a tape you were listening to?  Or, years later did you see the hand of Someone Else in your life and finally recognize that He is in charge of your happily ever after?  

I know that I have.  I have prayed for many things in my life and come to discover that He usually knows what I really need.  All things are answered in His time.  It might be moments or even years later, but they are answered.  

"Every man's life is a fairy tale written by God's fingers".  Hans Christian Andersen

If one shoe can change a life, what small simple things can change ours?  What can we do a little better to be the fairytale in someone elses life.  I have come to discover that God uses willing hands to be the answers to prayer.  He uses willing hearts to lift another up out of depression and despair.  He uses us for His purposes, if we will only let Him, and not only does it bless the lives of others, but it blesses our own as well.  

"Fairy Tales are more than true; not because they tell us that dragons exist, but because they tell us that dragons can be beaten".

And that is the lesson that I love the most!  C.S. Lewis once said: "Some day you will be old enough to start reading fairy tales again".

May you not only read them, but be in them as well and may you go forward and slay your dragons!

-----

Patty Ann is a busy mother, grandmother, and wife. She lives her life in the woods she loves up on the top of a beautiful mountain. She loves music, photography and writing. Most of all she loves her Heavenly Father and enjoys writing about his influence in her life. You can find her on her blog at Pitterle Postings

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Finishing the Family...Or Not Yet?

Tuesday, June 21, 2011


Long before I had children, someone told me that when you are done adding to your family, you just know. I remember nodding, and hoping it was true. And then I reached the period in my life where those kinds of decisions need to be made. It turns out, at least for me, it's not nearly as simple as all that.

Whether or not there is a third baby for us has been a very hot topic lately at our house. And it's not a case of my husband or I wanting another child while the other doesn't. No, we are both sitting on the fence, staring at the murky ground on either side and wondering which is the better way to go. I'm so incredibly disappointed that I just don't know.

While I'm not going to lay all our concerns out here (we have so many!), I feel comfortable discussing a few:

We only have two kids at this point, which in the Mormon world is nothing. I, however, am afraid that by adding more, I will reach the point where I cannot emotionally give to them what they deserve. I am pretty sure I could love another one no problem, but I learned from my own family that love alone will only get you so far.

I was one of seven, and I had a mother that constantly shut down or freaked out because she was so overwhelmed with us. She literally could not mother us adequately. I look back now and feel sad for her because I understand so much better why she was the way she was. I am also determined that I will not make the same mistake. Because there genuinely is a point where there are too many kids and love is not enough. While I am aware there are plenty of people who can effectively parent a lot of kids, I really don't think I am one of them.

A second issue is my husband's career. We've recently decided that we will be seeing this military thing through, so we've got about 11 more years of an ever-shifting, demanding schedule plus deployment to live. I'll be single parenting a lot, and adding more to the family is only going to make that more difficult.

Both of these reasons are factoring into the negative side, I realize, but there are positives, too. Our boys desperately want a younger sibling for some reason, and sometimes it seems to me that three is what makes our family feel complete. I am just not sure, however.

So, I have a request of all of you who have faced this decision and made it one way or another: How did you decide you were done? Do you regret that decision now? Or are you very sure it was the right one? What sorts of things made the difference? Is there any truth at all to the statement, "you'll just know when you're done"? Sometimes it helps to hear the thoughts of others when grappling with such weighty decisions.

-----

Ana is  a  restless soul who would love to keep moving around the world the  rest  of her life. This is probably why she married a submariner in the U.S  Navy seven years ago. They have two energetic little boys, and currently live in the Bahamas. She blogs about life in paradise at Sunrise on the Water.












Pic is from Flikr.

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Here To Stay

Monday, June 20, 2011

Have you ever lived inside a National Geographic map? For a year we have moved like push-pins from black dot to black dot all over Europe. Some of those dots of course, stand out as truly exceptional. Budapest is one of them. How it has managed to outlive the ravages of war is awe-inspiring: Ottomans, Catholics, Protestants, Atheists, Communists and Nazis have competed, confronted, and crusaded, but never crushed the city.

As I stood on our hotel balcony last month gaping at the panorama perched above the Danube , I realized that Budapest, colored at that moment by the most fantastic sunset, was more alive and exciting than ever only because Hungarians know too well how to tough it out.

Back in London, I received a text from a wife who was ready to leave her husband. “HE’S NOT WORTH IT,” she screamed in capital letters. “Ever since I married this terrible man, I have been miserable!”

“Are you saying that every day of your whole marriage has been totally unhappy?” My fingers flew in panic.

“No,” she admitted. “There have been good days and great ones too --” (I waited for the “but”…) “but there have been terrible ones like today!” Then back to all capitals: “It’s UP AND DOWN and I CAN’T TAKE IT ANYMORE!”

Now I know for a fact that her husband is far from terrible and that she has been far from miserable. I know because my husband and I have been working closely with this couple on the road from new member to temple patron. There is something about that fifth principle of the gospel: enduring to the end, which the Adversary takes particular exception with. He concentrates his forces on all of us in that stage of development but especially on those who are green in the gospel or in marriage or in parenthood.

While in Budapest, we walked with our personal guide, Peter Polczman. He told us they’d moved all the statues of toppled communist elites to a park where they have no one to preach to but each other. He pointed out what used to be Gestapo Headquarters and is now a museum. He led us down a residential street where old people sit on benches, watching young people hurry by.

“My grandmother,” he said, as we sat on a stone wall (the ruins of some empire or another), “has seen it all.”

“How did she survive?” I had to know.

“She just didn’t get worked up over things.” (I looked surprised.) “She knew everything would pass.”

Determined longevity clearly takes guts. But is it always the kind of guts that ‘screws courage to the sticking place'? Or can it be the kind that bobs, buoy-like, up and down, anchored in place? At fifty-two, I would agree with Peter’s grandmother: most of what we get worked up over is not here to stay. Our womanly days are rarely catastrophic; they just require coping – which, often enough -- is victory enough.

-----

Mona muses every Sunday at Mona's Gospel Musings and preaches romance in marriage at Mona's Musings with a Hint of Romance. She is the mother of four plus three and the award-winning author or With Mine Own Hand: The Musical Account of Nephi. For more pictures of Budapest and for a daily Hint of Romance, go to Mona's Musings on Facebook.



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The brain switch: God vs. Satan

Friday, June 17, 2011


Do you ever have a to-do list circling around in your brain that makes you dizzy?  As soon as you take 15 seconds to focus on one task that needs to be done, it inevitably branches into a chain of other related tasks, and the list grows longer.  I don't know what to call it, but it's a state of deep sighs, overwhelming pressure, and overactive irritability.

Satan loves this phase.  This is when my mind is ripe for any of his favorite mantras:  You can't do this.  There's no way.  What were you thinking?  You'll never meet expectations. You can't even control your own life; how can you be a good mother/wife/Visiting teacher/friend/volunteer/(insert role here)? You are incapable.  You are failing.

The weird thing is how easy it is to forget who Satan really is.  He is a liar.  Pure and simple.  An every-thing-he-says-is-not-the-way-things-REALLY-are liar.

I attended a meeting once where I asked Sister Julie Beck this question:  I know there is good guilt and bad guilt, but what role should guilt play and what role should it not play?”

I took copious notes as she talked extensively about the unnecessary pressures that women put on themselves.  Here are some of the points she touched on:
  • Any thought that tells you “You are not good enough” is from Satan.   If the thought tells you “You can do better, and I’ll help you,” it is  from Heavenly Father.
  • There will never be enough of you to do all your heart wants to do.
  • Pray, eliminate your distractions, and follow the Spirit.
  • We impose things on ourselves that the Lord would never impose.
  • Be an example of joyful gospel living.
  • Beg for miracles every morning.  Recognize and give thanks for them every night.
  • Navigate this experience you’ve been given with dignity, faith, hope and charity.
  • She recommended making a three-column to-do list every day:  Column #1) The essentials (short  list of things that are eternally important:  Pray, read scriptures,  maybe some days the list will include temple or service or family time),  Column #2) Should do (feed children, clean clothes, go to work, etc.), Column #3)  Nice to do (wish list).   Whatever you do, make sure the essentials  happen, and work hard on your should-do list, and you’ll be surprised how  often you get around to things on your “nice to do” list.  She also said  that women cannot work all three shifts in a day.  We can do one well,  one pretty well, and we need one shift to rest and take care of  ourselves.  She recommended deciding which shift was the most important  time of the day when we need to be at our very best (for her it was the  afternoon into the evening when kids came home from school and prepared  for bed, etc.), and then use the other shifts to help us prepare for and  get ready for the important shift (maybe prepare dinner in the morning,  rest well at night, etc.).

Sister Beck is a genius.  Truly inspired.  Now I like to pretend that there is a switch in my brain that helps me distinguish between messages from my Heavenly Father and messages from the other guy (Satan) who pretends to be as cool and smart as Heavenly Father.  Such a poser.  When the message sounds anything like "You're not good enough," I just need to flip the switch.  It's not an on-off switch, but more like a true-false switch, so I just need to make sure it's switched to the truth.  Like Sister Beck promised, there's always hope that comes with truth-- a promise that everything important will get done, that it will all work out, and that I have help.  If I turn to the source of that help-- my Heavenly Father-- clarity almost always follows.  And clarity is SO much better than that discouraging, brain-spinning mode.

President Uctdorft was speaking specifically to women when he said,


"We know  that sometimes it can be difficult to keep our heads above water. In  fact, in our world of change, challenges, and checklists, sometimes it  can seem nearly impossible to avoid feeling overwhelmed by emotions of  suffering and sorrow.     I am  not suggesting that we can simply flip a switch and stop the negative  feelings that distress us. This isn’t a pep talk or an attempt to  encourage those sinking in quicksand to imagine instead they are  relaxing on a beach. I recognize that in all of our lives there are real  concerns."

He makes a good point about the light-switch theory; it's not quite as simple as that.  I think it's because it depends too much upon ourselves.  But when we literally switch our focus and our thoughts to the Lord and our eternal priorities, things seem more manageable because we are reminded of His willingness to help us.  President Uctdorf concluded:


"I believe that as you are faithful and diligent in keeping the  commandments of God, as you draw closer to Him in faith, hope, and  charity, things will work together for your good.  I believe that as you immerse yourselves in the work of our  Father . . . God  will encircle you in the arms of His love. Discouragement, inadequacy, and weariness will give way to a life of meaning, grace, and fulfillment."

I believe him.  And when I realize that the work of our Father that we should immerse ourselves in is as simple as covenant keeping, including serving my own family with love, the weariness is lifted.  Because I can do that.  I am capable.  I am not failing at what matters most.  And God will help me.  Heaven knows I need the help.  Just ask my brain.

-----



Stephanie is a mom of three young and  relentless children. Her interests include Latin music, naps,  restaurants, writing, travel, teaching, housework denial and long  showers. Stephanie seeks for the divinity in motherhood--- tries to  share it when she finds it, and tries to laugh when she doesn't. She  blogs for fun, posterity, and therapy. Her musings are chronicled at Diapers and Divinity.





image credit

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Todays Contestant in the Ugliest Couch Contest...

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Although we don't actually have a world's ugliest couch contest, our next design question comes from someone who feels they have a pretty good contender.

Here are the exact thoughts about the state of their seating from Journey Beyond Survival.

"Okay. So I may be able to win the world's Ugliest Couch contest. We're poor.

Waaaay poor. Mr. Survival is job hunting poor.

Please give me ideas. I hate blue chair, couch, loveseat although I am grateful to those that gave it to us. Because we like sitting down.

But."

That is quite the quandary, my dear.  Beyond slip covers, there really just isn't much you can do to change the actual color of your furniture.  Unfortunately, slip covers can be rather expensive, even if purchased from a store and not custom made.  But hopefully the following suggestions will make your room a little more pleasant for you even with your blue furniture.  

First of all, I would recommend bringing other colors into your room that would compliment your blue furniture.  Darker shades of blue would be a safe choice and can be introduced in anything from a matte on a picture to throw pillows with darker shades of blue.  Assuming you like blue at all, of course.

Furniture placement also goes a long way towards making your room feel comfortable.  I would consider moving things around a bit to see what works for your family.  Placing the sofa in front of the window not only looks proportionate, but it guarantees all your children can stand on it while looking out the window.  Much less fighting over space.  Also, placing the love seat on the opposite wall under the picture will look good as well.
Furniture arrangement in a long, narrow room can be a challenge.  Although moving the furniture around can be tiring, you'll be happy you did once you find that just right arrangement.

Be sure to look around your own house for things that you can use in your front room.  An unused picture, mirror, pillow, etc. from another room can be the perfect thing for your front room.  Best of all, it's budget friendly.  

Remember, a lot can be done to improve a room with spending little or no money at all!  The important thing is that your home  reflects your family and is a happy place to be.

-----




Once upon a time, this Lady got a degree in Interior Design.  She now spends her days taking care of her 2 little girls and 1 computer geek husband.  Although it can't be said that she likes to learn everything the hard way, it can be said that she usually does.

You can read more on her personal blog Lady of Perpetual Chaos





*Photos courtesy of Journey Beyond Survival

 Interior Design 101: You have questions? We have answers! (Well, about decorating and design that is.) Leave your most burning decor questions in the comments, and we will tackle them in upcoming posts! PLEASE leave your contact information, because sometimes we need more information or a photo to see just exactly what you're talking about.  And remember, there are no dumb questions.  Really.  Just ask!
 

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Simple Drop Earrings Tutorial

Tuesday, June 14, 2011



These earrings are so simple to make, but use some good techniques. (Honestly, my 3-year-old helped me get a bridal order of these earrings ready. Think I should pay her?)

Once you get the hang of these, look at a few of your favorite pieces of jewelry- chances are they're made with similar techniques. Just think of the possibilities!


These supplies are readily available at your local craft store, or even Wal-Mart!


You could probably go pretty far with just a plain set of needlenose pliers from the toolbox, to practice with but I recommend getting a jewelry set from the craft store. A plain vanilla set costs about $10. These pliers have springs in them to keep them OPEN when at rest, which is much easier than pliers that are naturally CLOSED.


I'm using sterling silver elements, with Swarovski Crystal in the peridot color. The rondelles are Swarovski as well, crystal color. Also, you can use whatever earrings you prefer- the bride wanted leverback, so that's what we did!


Simple Drop Earrings


Ingredients for this tutorial:
(2) leverback earrings
(2) 8 mm round (5000 style) crystals
(4) 6 mm bicone crystals
(2) 6 mm crystal rondelles
(2) silver 2" head pins




Start with one head pin, thread the beads in this order:
8 mm round
6 mm crystal rondelle
6 mm bicone
6 mm bicone



With your clippers, snip the head pin off about 3/8" above the last bead.








With your needlenose pliers, grasp head pin just above last bead, and bend at a 90 degree angle.







With your round-tip pliers, grasp the tip of the head pin, and curl tip up and into a curve, back to the 90 degree bend. You'll have to turn the pliers over at some point in that curve, unless your hand CAN turn around backwards.... regardless of how you do it (!!) leave the loop open just a smidge for the next step. (Oh, and please ignore how I'm holding the pliers- I was just trying to get them in front of the camera! Thanks.)










With your needlenose pliers, make sure the end is straight.




Hook your loop onto the ring at the base of your earring, 
and pinch close with the needlenose pliers.










Repeat with remaining supplies, and enjoy!





-----

no-heat curls
Myrnie is a stay-at-home, do-it-herself kind  of Mom.  She blogs at DIY Mama and I Wonder Woman.






All photo credits are Myrnie's.

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The Best Husband is a Good Father

Monday, June 13, 2011

As an American serving as a Relief Society President in London, I have sat beside or across from my sisters and listen to their stories with intense interest. Some begin in far-away places like Nigeria, Ghana, South Africa, or the Philippines. Some begin very nearby. All of the stories end here – or rather – are paused here – in London, playing themselves out. Some of my friends struggle at present, but all dream of abundance for themselves and their children. Far too many have sad experience with the men in their lives: with the fathers of their children. The worst of these men have abandoned their own families.

The disappearance or disengagement of biological fathers leaves wounds in the hearts of women and children that bleed for a long time afterward no matter what language you cry in. Whether the absent father is a distant memory or a fresh sorrow, he has killed something instead of giving life.

We can hardly believe that during one week this August, the baby of our bunch will be turning 22, graduating from BYU, and will become wife to her best friend of five years. Her father will lavish time, attention, and his hard-earned money on her, like he has since she was a tiny girl with ringlets. She used to make him bend over for a kiss and call him "Beastie", the fairy-tale prince, but it’s much easier for her to reach his cheek now. On each of her special occasions this summer, all made possible by her father, she will wrap herself around him and whisper, “Thank you, Daddy. Thank you.”


Thank you honey, thank you. Do you really know what it means to me as a woman to have the father of my children committed to their well-being? Can a man appreciate the depth of devotion his wife feels toward him when he gets down on the floor to tussle with the children? Does the male brain comprehend a woman’s delight when a big man sits a little child on his lap; when he opens his wallet to pay for that new pair of new shoes; when he accompanies her to parent night or makes certain the kitchen cupboards are full? Does he appreciate the security he creates when she is able to trust his discipline? Can he know that she is his forever IF forever, he will protect not only her, but the little people that are an extension of her?

We will give our girl away this August, and although my man says he is looking forward to having me truly to himself for the first time, I know he will cry just the same because he loves being a daddy.

"...men who accept the challenge of good fathering report that they come away with increased marital fulfillment. Their effort comes back to them many times over in the admiration of their wives." ~ Dr. Harley, His Needs, Her Needs
-----

Mona muses every Sunday at Mona's Gospel Musings and preaches romance in marriage at Mona's Musings with a Hint of Romance. She is the mother of four plus three and the award-winning author or With Mine Own Hand: The Musical Account of Nephi. For a daily Hint of Romance, go to Mona's Musings on Facebook.






Photography from Dreamstime


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Sunday Devotional - Honesty

Sunday, June 12, 2011



This is the winning video from the International Video competition held by the church.

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Post of the Week

Saturday, June 11, 2011


Your best stuff from this week. 

Ready. Set. Go.

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How to Cure Summer Boredom

Friday, June 10, 2011

The language that my children are proficient in spewing is the language of “I’m bored Mom”. Honestly? I’m bored of hearing it, and we’re only into summer vacation one week.

My home is like most—I have two teenagers—sixteen and thirteen,  an eight year old and a three year old. In order for everyone to be happily entertained, I have to plan three different types of activities.

Frankly, it’s exhausting.

I was telling my friend Carol about my predicament and how I just didn’t know how I was going to deal with them this summer and she shared something that she has done with her kids.

The Summer Story Camp.

I was intrigued as she told me how the program is a self-paced program that has six weeks worth of questions and ideas for crafts and activities to keep all ages entertained.

I got really excited because my oldest child is a budding photographer and wordsmith and the thirteen year old is just discovering those joys. So I came up with some photo prompts for them to use that went along with the Summer Story Camp and quite honestly? They are entertained.

Some of the questions my big kids are working on are:  “Why do you want to go to college? What college do you want to go to? If it’s local, take a tour of “your” college and take pictures of the college to make a photo collage. Find the dorms, the cafeteria, where you would take classes for your Major…  (If the chosen school is not local, go on the internet and find photos of your school to use for your photo collage).”

The younger kids are answering questions like: “Tell why your favorite food is your favorite. Draw a picture of you eating your favorite food. What is your favorite TV show? Why do you like it so much? Draw a picture of the main people in the show.” Granted, I have to write the answers down for the three year old, but it gives us specific time together where I am listening and really learning more about her.

I bought my two little girls disposable cameras and when we go on field trips for the big kids, their jobs are to document the trip from their point of view. Do you know what kinds of things are in your small ones point of view? Try that little experiment. It’s very interesting. 

Printing those photos and letting them then make their own “Field Trip Scrapbook” has been another fun activity in the Summer Story Camp. My eight year old can explain, in detail, why she took the various pictures that she did. The three year old just copies her. Which helps the eight year old see how she has to be a good example for her younger sister.

A teaching moment AND an entertaining moment.

Win win for everyone.

Disclaimer: I was NOT paid One Red Penny, nor did I receive any free products in exchange for this post. The stories and ideas are all my own. I love this product because it has helped me connect with my kids, have questions to ask them that facilitates conversation. And I don’t want to constantly eat my children like a wild animal because they’ve told me they are bored for the umpteenth time. 

If you want to try the Summer Story Camp head over here.

For more ideas on how to cure the Summer Boredom Blues, head over to Peonies and Poppyseeds – she has an amazing list of 100 things to do this summer!

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familyElisa is the owner of Mormon Mommy Blogs . Her husband, four kids (ages ranging 16 to 3), a mortgage and a dog is what provides her food for fodder on her non-award winning blog: Crazyland: Tales from the Motherboard.

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