A Compliment

my super cool earrings

As I found the end of the line, I will admit that not only was I feeling irritated, but my heart was heavy. I was heading out to another long night of work at a job that I really did not like, but was a necessary evil. The fast food employee taking everyone's order insisted on idle chit-chat with every person he waited on. I was irritated. I was tired. I was sad and I was in hurry.

Prior to leaving for work, I had another big blow up with my teenage daughter which left me feeling like a failure as a Mother... and as a human. My teenage son was teasing my nine-year old to the point of tears and the three-year-old was just happy to be eating fruit snacks.

I had made a dinner that no one wanted to eat and my husband was going to be home late from work again. Which meant that I was left hoping that my children didn't kill each other before he got home.

My husband and I had argued earlier in the day and I was feeling bad about the interaction  that we had. 

My heart was heavy because of the unseen trials that were unfolding in my home. Most people have no idea the struggles we have powered through over the past year and the battles we have chosen to fight -- or not fight -- that have been strategically chosen with the help of a trained third party. 

As I stood in line waiting to order my ridiculously over-priced sandwich I watched this pimple faced boy work miracles. Almost everyone standing in line looked weighted down with the troubles of the world and this boy was doing something amazing. Everyone that came up to order, he greeted with a smile, and a compliment.

A compliment.

It was such a simple thing, but that simple thing changed the way people were feeling.

I watched him with intrigue as he worked his magic mojo and the complete surprise on each persons face as this complete stranger acknolwedged that he saw them and then said something kind to them.

"Hey! I like that shirt."

"Hey! Your hair looks really nice tonight"

"Hey! Great purse! What can I get you?"

When it was my turn he simply said "Hey! Those are super cool earrings! What can I get you?"

That's it. My earrings. They were cool.

And yet that simple little sentence made me feel really good inside. I didn't feel like such a loser Mom or wife any more and I felt like maybe I could pull myself up by my bootstraps and carry on.

However, here is what I found to be the most interesting: This boy was genuinely happy. He was simply being kind to others-- pointing out the good things he saw in complete strangers -- and he was the one reaping the most benefit. He had no idea where I was emotionally or how hard things had been for me lately. But his simple act of kindness -- telling me my earrings were cool -- lifted my sagging spirits and enabled me to power through to another day.

So many of us are carrying "hidden sorrows that the eye can't see" and some of us are trying to just keep one nostril above water so that we don't drown. Interactions with others can be the difference between a breaking point or a pick-me-up.

We will be held accountable for how we use our words -- in real life and in the cyber world. We can't see those hidden sorrows that we as a people are carrying around. Some have heavy hearts and just need one kind word to get them through to the next day. I think sometimes with the ease and convenience of Technology, we have forgotten how to just be kind. We forget that there are people on the other side of that screen actually reading the words we have hastily typed out. People whose hidden sorrow we cannot see.

I tried the experiment at work that night and you know what? By the end of my eight hour shift, I left actually feeling happy. It made me feel better to make the people I interacted with smile-- even if it was for just a few seconds.

That pimply faced teenage boy taught me a great lesson that snowy night: Greet people with a smile and leave them with a kind word-- even in the virtual world. You never know if that will be the only kind thing they hear that day.

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